Note 12: Embracing the Perfectly Unbalanced

When I was in college, I dabbled in astrology. And, like many brilliant college students, I got a tattoo on my hip of my astrological sign, the scales.

Over 15 years later, I’m a wife and mother of two with a full-time career….

….and a tattoo of a scale.

As if I need another reminder of how unbalanced my life feels. All.The.Time.

Oh, sweet irony.

I’ll spare you a close up of the ink. But you can see it peeking out as proof it exists. #nofakenews

I felt myself letting the chaos get to me a bit too much. I was snapping at the babies, eating my feelings, and yelling a lot.

I needed  to even the scale.

Sadly, my friends, I’m not sharing some clever top 10 list with you to help with work\life\baby\lover balance. I read all the articles and attempted all the tips. I implemented cleaning at night while everyone was in bed, writing tasks in planners alongside my work assignments, the all encompassing meal-prep….. the works!

But, they don’t work.

The  tasks just caused more time away from the boys and more stress on me. Libras may crave balance but we cringe at structure.

Ya’ want to know what actually did the trick?

Balancing my expectations.

I was nervous to share that with you all at first in fear of coming across as lazy or weak. But, therein lies the problem so many women face. We have unreasonable expectations of ourselves and have unreasonable expectations placed on us.

We don’t want anyone to know that we feel like one more gust of responsibility will knock us off our feet.

I know you know the feeling. Your house may be spotless but your kids feel you’re ignoring them. Or, your kids feel totally fulfilled as your sink continues to fill.

Or, you are killing it at work but your home life is chaos. And doughnuts sound like the most balanced breakfast in the world and so your baby weight hangs out for a while longer.

Didn’t wash my hair so we could make it to the hayride on time. It shows, but did anyone in this photo care but me? Nope. #greaseawaythebalance

It’s all OK. In the grand scheme of life when everyone is grown and moving on, these crazy moments are what will bring your heart balance.

Isn’t that what we all really want in the end?

So now I just kinda ignore the crumbs for the extra snuggles. Have a liquid dinner when the kids go down so me and hubby can binge watch Narcos. Take turns killing it at work and slaying it at home.

I took another look at my tattoo, and realized it’s in perfect alignment with my c-section scar.

How’s that for balance?

Unbalanced Is The New Balance: Noted.